You Learn

After a while you learn the subtle difference 
Between holding a hand and chaining a soul,
And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning
And company doesn’t mean security.
And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts 
And presents aren’t promises,
And you begin to accept your defeats 
With your head up and your eyes open 
With the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child,
And you learn to build all your roads on today 
Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans 
And futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.
After a while you learn… 
That even sunshine burns if you get too much.
So you plant your garden and decorate your own soul, 
Instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure…
That you really are strong
And you really do have worth…
And you learn and learn…
With every good-bye you learn.

(Argentine poet Jorge Luis Borges, on love and loss)