12) "Would you rather go hunting with Dick Cheney or riding in a car over a bridge with Ted Kennedy? At least Cheney takes you to the hospital." --Talk radio host Rush Limbaugh
11) "Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld announced he's stepping down. Rumsfeld said, 'I made the decision after it became clear that I couldn't do my job effectively -- and then I waited three years.'" --Conan O'Brien
10) “He a very wise man and very strong -- although perhaps not so strong as his father Barbara." --Borat, on President George W. Bush
9) "My No. 1 goal is to not go to jail." --Congresswoman-elect Michele Bachmann (R-MN), during "freshman orientation" for new members of Congress
8) "So where does the race stand now, with just over a month to go? (George) Allen has angered Blacks, Jews and Macacans, while (Jim) Webb has angered Women and The Horny. Virginia, now it's up to you to decide which one of these two men will help you build a bridge, to let's say, the early- to mid- 20th century." --Jon Stewart, on the Virginia Senate race
7) "Baseball, our national pastime, still lies under the shadow of steroid accusations. But I have faith in Baseball Commissioner George W. Bush when he says, "we will find the steroid users if we have to tap every phone in America." –"President" Al Gore, addressing the nation on Saturday Night Live
6) "We all know what GOP means now. It means grope our pages." --Former Democratic Sen. Max Cleland, on the Mark Foley scandal
5) “To the vice president's credit, he did own up to it. On FOX News he said the fault was his, he can't blame anybody else. Boy, it's amazing, the only time you get accountability out of this administration is when they are actually holding a smoking gun." --Bill Maher
4) "You know there are all these conspiracy theories that Dick runs the country, or Karl runs the country. Why aren't there any conspiracy theories that I run the country? Really ticks me off." --President Bush, at the 2006 Gridiron Dinner
3) "Ladies and gentlemen, I feel chipper tonight. I survived the White House shake-up." --President Bush, at the 2006 White House Correspondents' Association dinner
2) "Well, I really think he shatters the myth of white supremacy once and for all." --Rep. Charlie Rangel, when asked what he thought about President Bush
1) "I stand by this man because he stands for things. Not only for things, he stands on things. Things like aircraft carriers, and rubble, and recently flooded city squares. And that sends a strong message that no matter what happens to America she will always rebound with the most powerfully staged photo-ops in the world." --Comedian Stephen Colbert, roasting Bush at the White House Correspondents' Association dinner
11) "Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld announced he's stepping down. Rumsfeld said, 'I made the decision after it became clear that I couldn't do my job effectively -- and then I waited three years.'" --Conan O'Brien
10) “He a very wise man and very strong -- although perhaps not so strong as his father Barbara." --Borat, on President George W. Bush
9) "My No. 1 goal is to not go to jail." --Congresswoman-elect Michele Bachmann (R-MN), during "freshman orientation" for new members of Congress
8) "So where does the race stand now, with just over a month to go? (George) Allen has angered Blacks, Jews and Macacans, while (Jim) Webb has angered Women and The Horny. Virginia, now it's up to you to decide which one of these two men will help you build a bridge, to let's say, the early- to mid- 20th century." --Jon Stewart, on the Virginia Senate race
7) "Baseball, our national pastime, still lies under the shadow of steroid accusations. But I have faith in Baseball Commissioner George W. Bush when he says, "we will find the steroid users if we have to tap every phone in America." –"President" Al Gore, addressing the nation on Saturday Night Live
6) "We all know what GOP means now. It means grope our pages." --Former Democratic Sen. Max Cleland, on the Mark Foley scandal
5) “To the vice president's credit, he did own up to it. On FOX News he said the fault was his, he can't blame anybody else. Boy, it's amazing, the only time you get accountability out of this administration is when they are actually holding a smoking gun." --Bill Maher
4) "You know there are all these conspiracy theories that Dick runs the country, or Karl runs the country. Why aren't there any conspiracy theories that I run the country? Really ticks me off." --President Bush, at the 2006 Gridiron Dinner
3) "Ladies and gentlemen, I feel chipper tonight. I survived the White House shake-up." --President Bush, at the 2006 White House Correspondents' Association dinner
2) "Well, I really think he shatters the myth of white supremacy once and for all." --Rep. Charlie Rangel, when asked what he thought about President Bush
1) "I stand by this man because he stands for things. Not only for things, he stands on things. Things like aircraft carriers, and rubble, and recently flooded city squares. And that sends a strong message that no matter what happens to America she will always rebound with the most powerfully staged photo-ops in the world." --Comedian Stephen Colbert, roasting Bush at the White House Correspondents' Association dinner
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